Actually, it's not really a secret - it simply goes unnoticed. So, take notice!
The most valuable things in life, such as love, happiness, and respect, are what you might call "enigmas". They are not what they seem. Such things cannot be gathered, chased, or taken. They cannot be held. In order to have such things, you must give them away!
You heard that right. If you want to be loved, you must first give love. If you want happiness, you must first give it away. If you doubt this, consider the following:
I was really in the dumps. A recent divorce and other disasters had me ready to give up. It seemed that happiness was not in the cards. While feeling sorry for myself, I stopped into a coffee shop to drown my sorrow in 100 proof caffeine. A young girl who could not have been more than 16 waited on me. She was visibly upset, and I could see she had been crying. I asked another waitress what the problem was, and was informed that the girl's boyfriend had broken her young heart. I paid for my coffee and left. Within 30 minutes, I returned with a single rose, handed it to the girl with the broken heart, smiled, then turned and left.
As I reached the door, I turned and saw that she was smiling, and bouncing over to another table where an old man sat, alone. There was a spark of renewed happiness in her, and strangely enough, in spite of all my own troubles, I, too, was feeling happier for having given happiness to another. But my happiness soon faded as I watched her give that rose to that old man. I felt "used".
A few days later I returned to that coffee shop. The girl bounced over to me, all smiles and bubbling over with apparent joy. I told her that I was happy to be able to make some small difference in her mood that day, but was disappointed that she so readily gave away my gift. She smiled sweetly, grabbed my hand gently, and whispered, "Don't you know? You should, because I learned it from you. Happiness spreads when you give it away. You gave me the rose, and with it, happiness. I saw that lonely old man who had lost his wife last fall, and gave the rose to him, so that he, too, might share in the happiness. By giving him the rose, I found happiness a second time that day. And he returned next morning to say he gave the rose to a lady in the complex he lives in, and they are now spending time together. And that made me happy a third time. So, you see, the more happiness you give away, the more you have. I thought you knew!"
Thanks to the wisdom of that little 16 year-old girl, I have not had too many days without finding some happiness. All I have to do is give some away... It works! And it's easy. Try it.